The Cookout

DaBeast · 9/30/21

Someone I know is currently in a very odd relationship. He's dating this woman that hasn't had sex with him in a while, and isn't into cuddling or being close together. The odd thing about it all, is that these two have been dating for a while now, maybe a year or two.

With all that being said, do you think you could date someone without having sex and having any intimacy? I couldn't do it. I feel like that's just a relationship that should have ended a lot sooner. But, I know some people who just date someone to live with them, so maybe that's what is going on there.

Could you see yourself sticking with a relationship that didn't have any love?

Caprice · 9/30/21

No. What are we in a “relationship” for? Sounds like a roommate. Are they intimate in other ways such as emotionally, intellectually, etc? If so, then the physical intimacy should follow. So that person might not be interested anymore and they’re over the relationship. Maybe they’re checking out mentally and will leave eventually. Sounds like some communication needs to happen if they were having sex at first and then it stopped over time. What’s really going on…

Jay · 9/30/21

DaBeast said:
Someone I know is currently in a very odd relationship. He's dating this woman that hasn't had sex with him in a while, and isn't into cuddling or being close together. The odd thing about it all, is that these two have been dating for a while now, maybe a year or two.

With all that being said, do you think you could date someone without having sex and having any intimacy? I couldn't do it. I feel like that's just a relationship that should have ended a lot sooner. But, I know some people who just date someone to live with them, so maybe that's what is going on there.

Could you see yourself sticking with a relationship that didn't have any love?

He ain't in a relationship, he getting played. She sexing someone else and then using him as an emotional tampon with a wallet. Oh and my answer is:

Caprice said:
No. What are we in a “relationship” for? Sounds like a roommate. Are they intimate in other ways such as emotionally, intellectually, etc? If so, then the physical intimacy should follow. So that person might not be interested anymore and they’re over the relationship. Maybe they’re checking out mentally and will leave eventually. Sounds like some communication needs to happen if they were having sex at first and then it stopped over time. What’s really going on…

Of course it's no for you.

Maximum · 9/30/21

DaBeast said:
Could you see yourself sticking with a relationship that didn't have any love?

Jay · 9/30/21

Maximum said:

You just pen pals at that point.

Troy · 9/30/21

No way.

Red Velvet · 9/30/21

That's like chocolate you can't eat, no thanks.

DaBeast · 10/4/21

Caprice said:
No. What are we in a “relationship” for? Sounds like a roommate. Are they intimate in other ways such as emotionally, intellectually, etc? If so, then the physical intimacy should follow. So that person might not be interested anymore and they’re over the relationship. Maybe they’re checking out mentally and will leave eventually. Sounds like some communication needs to happen if they were having sex at first and then it stopped over time. What’s really going on…

Exactly. For me, a relationship has to have love and intimacy, otherwise it's not love and just a friendship.

Oh for sure, they need therapy imo. When they got together they couldn't stop touching each other, but now it's like no intimacy at all. I've asked him a few times why he doesn't just break up with her, and he says he loves her and that she's having an "episode" or whatever. So I'm guessing she's crazy, doesn't want to give him any intimacy and that's that. I told him he's being used, but he wouldn't have it. It's his life, and I shared my thoughts on it to him.

I thought that maybe she was here in the country illegally and they are going to get married to help her citizenship or something, but she was born in the US, so that's not it either.

Jay said:
He ain't in a relationship, he getting played. She sexing someone else and then using him as an emotional tampon with a wallet. Oh and my answer is:

Exactly. I don't understand how he goes along with it. It makes no sense to me. She's a beautiful woman, but she does nothing with him, spends very little time with him otherwise, and spends all of his money.

Jay · 10/4/21

DaBeast said:
Exactly. For me, a relationship has to have love and intimacy, otherwise it's not love and just a friendship.

Oh for sure, they need therapy imo. When they got together they couldn't stop touching each other, but now it's like no intimacy at all. I've asked him a few times why he doesn't just break up with her, and he says he loves her and that she's having an "episode" or whatever. So I'm guessing she's crazy, doesn't want to give him any intimacy and that's that. I told him he's being used, but he wouldn't have it. It's his life, and I shared my thoughts on it to him.

I thought that maybe she was here in the country illegally and they are going to get married to help her citizenship or something, but she was born in the US, so that's not it either.

Exactly. I don't understand how he goes along with it. It makes no sense to me. She's a beautiful woman, but she does nothing with him, spends very little time with him otherwise, and spends all of his money.

He's a simp.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Jay said:
He ain't in a relationship, he getting played. She sexing someone else and then using him as an emotional tampon with a wallet. Oh and my answer is:

Of course it's no for you.

He is definitely being used.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

DaBeast said:
Someone I know is currently in a very odd relationship. He's dating this woman that hasn't had sex with him in a while, and isn't into cuddling or being close together. The odd thing about it all, is that these two have been dating for a while now, maybe a year or two.

With all that being said, do you think you could date someone without having sex and having any intimacy? I couldn't do it. I feel like that's just a relationship that should have ended a lot sooner. But, I know some people who just date someone to live with them, so maybe that's what is going on there.

Could you see yourself sticking with a relationship that didn't have any love?

I've gone a good while without having sex, but I was never in a relationship. It was actually one of the best things to happen to me since I was able to get much more accomplished than most men I know. I could not be in a relationship and not have sex for a long time though. That is one of the requirements!

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Caprice said:
No. What are we in a “relationship” for? Sounds like a roommate. Are they intimate in other ways such as emotionally, intellectually, etc? If so, then the physical intimacy should follow. So that person might not be interested anymore and they’re over the relationship. Maybe they’re checking out mentally and will leave eventually. Sounds like some communication needs to happen if they were having sex at first and then it stopped over time. What’s really going on…

Good points. I feel as if she is having sex elsewhere and he is getting used.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Maximum said:

Same here

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Jay said:
You just pen pals at that point.

Sounds like it is worse than that.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Jay said:
He's a simp.

Most def. I bet the woman's friends are laughing at him behind his back and calling him something similar.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

DaBeast said:
Exactly. For me, a relationship has to have love and intimacy, otherwise it's not love and just a friendship.

Oh for sure, they need therapy imo. When they got together they couldn't stop touching each other, but now it's like no intimacy at all. I've asked him a few times why he doesn't just break up with her, and he says he loves her and that she's having an "episode" or whatever. So I'm guessing she's crazy, doesn't want to give him any intimacy and that's that. I told him he's being used, but he wouldn't have it. It's his life, and I shared my thoughts on it to him.

I thought that maybe she was here in the country illegally and they are going to get married to help her citizenship or something, but she was born in the US, so that's not it either.

Exactly. I don't understand how he goes along with it. It makes no sense to me. She's a beautiful woman, but she does nothing with him, spends very little time with him otherwise, and spends all of his money.

Spends all of his money? Ain't no way that could be me. She is getting her back blown out somewhere else.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Red Velvet said:
That's like chocolate you can't eat, no thanks.

Yep. I don't want chocolate that is in my house, but I can't eat it.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Jay said:
He ain't in a relationship, he getting played. She sexing someone else and then using him as an emotional tampon with a wallet. Oh and my answer is:

Of course it's no for you.

Emotional tampon is so correct. Well said.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

Troy said:
No way.

The crazy part is he ain't the only one going through this. I bet when he puts his foot down and say I'm not spending any more money with you, she will accuse him of something whether it is being gay or not a real man or something else. And of course she will tell all her friends how she played him. Her friends will giggle every time he comes around.

Deleted member 1946 · 6/6/23

DaBeast said:
Exactly. For me, a relationship has to have love and intimacy, otherwise it's not love and just a friendship.

Oh for sure, they need therapy imo. When they got together they couldn't stop touching each other, but now it's like no intimacy at all. I've asked him a few times why he doesn't just break up with her, and he says he loves her and that she's having an "episode" or whatever. So I'm guessing she's crazy, doesn't want to give him any intimacy and that's that. I told him he's being used, but he wouldn't have it. It's his life, and I shared my thoughts on it to him.

I thought that maybe she was here in the country illegally and they are going to get married to help her citizenship or something, but she was born in the US, so that's not it either.

Exactly. I don't understand how he goes along with it. It makes no sense to me. She's a beautiful woman, but she does nothing with him, spends very little time with him otherwise, and spends all of his money.

Do you know where she is spending a lot of her other time? I bet at a man's or woman's house getting ate out and having all kinds of fun.

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