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DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?

Goodness

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I have a friend who needs my advice. She met this cool dude in a train station and they got talking. After some weeks, He asked her out and she accepted. Of course, by this time, she had fallen heads over heels in love.

Last week, during their discussion, he mentioned he was 29 years old and her world came crashing.
I will tell you why.
She is way older (39years old)
My friend is confused. She is planning to break up the relationship and I have advised her otherwise.

So I ask; DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?
 

Red Velvet

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    I have a friend who needs my advice. She met this cool dude in a train station and they got talking. After some weeks, He asked her out and she accepted. Of course, by this time, she had fallen heads over heels in love.

    Last week, during their discussion, he mentioned he was 29 years old and her world came crashing.
    I will tell you why.
    She is way older (39years old)
    My friend is confused. She is planning to break up the relationship and I have advised her otherwise.

    So I ask; DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?
    It depends on what she is looking for Sis. I look at life in chapters and if they are in the same chapter it can work. I break it into 3 major groups: Build, Grow, and Maintain. If he is in Grow and she is in Maintain it will not work. If he is in Build and she is in any other stage it will not work. Also, if he wants kids, it’s dead in the water. Why does she want to cut it off, whats her concern?
     

    Blackgravity

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    I know saying "age ain't nothing but a number" is cliche but it's true for the most part. You judge someone on their mentality, maturity, goals, plans, and what they are looking for from the relationship. Tell her don't let age make her pre-judge a potentially good relationship. If there's nothing there between them it will show, give him a chance, he may be a CEO in the making.
     

    Barida

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    Age plays a big role in every relationship. I can't fathom what will make a younger guy go into a relationship with a lady that is 5 or 7 years older. This is because issue with respect will always pop up. If you are a man, you need to be a older than your partner for peace to reign.
     

    Jay

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    I know saying "age ain't nothing but a number" is cliche but it's true for the most part. You judge someone on their mentality, maturity, goals, plans, and what they are looking for from the relationship. Tell her don't let age make her pre-judge a potentially good relationship. If there's nothing there between them it will show, give him a chance, he may be a CEO in the making.
    The only reason I can see her wanting to cut it off 100% if he has expressed interest in children. In that event the relationship will not work as she is unable to provide what he’s looking for in a partner.
     

    TeeGee

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    I have seen marriages where the lady is way older that the man and they are still happily married, sometimes it all depends on the personality of the two individuals and what they hope to get out of each other , instead of worrying about age try to find out if you both are going the same direction In terms of goals, interest and if you truly love each other you can tie the knot.
     

    SINCEREM

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    xD, I don't get bothered with age when it comes to relationship because it is just a number. I wonder what's running through the other person's mind I mean the boy that made him to quit the relationship due to age difference. I don't see age as a barrier when it comes to relationship, even a 20 something year old man can find true love around a 50 something year old woman.
     

    Jay

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    xD, I don't get bothered with age when it comes to relationship because it is just a number. I wonder what's running through the other person's mind I mean the boy that made him to quit the relationship due to age difference. I don't see age as a barrier when it comes to relationship, even a 20 something year old man can find true love around a 50 something year old woman.
    Why would a 20 year old want to be with a 50 year old? That’s a FWB type situation ain’t nothing real going to come of a 30 year gap in age.
     

    MR-D-ROB

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    In my opinion that's not that big of an age gap. If they both like each other and are willing to make it work then I don't see a reason why age should matter.

    The thing that has to be realized though is that age gap is not going to go away. So that means she's going to be 50 when he's 40. 60 when he's 70.

    My personal experience has been that age, looks, and all the other superficial things don't really matter. What matters is that You're with someone that you like and love being around. As you get with someone like that you can grow old together no matter what changes as far as the superficial things that person's heart is always going to still be there.
     

    The Honorable

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    The thing that has to be realized though is that age gap is not going to go away. So that means she's going to be 50 when he's 40. 60 when he's 70.
    You're a wise man this is wisdom. When the age gaps get very big like 20 years, it's not too bad at 25 and 45 if you are having sex but when it's 55 and 75 it gets horrible.
     

    MarleyK20

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    I have a friend who needs my advice. She met this cool dude in a train station and they got talking. After some weeks, He asked her out and she accepted. Of course, by this time, she had fallen heads over heels in love.

    Last week, during their discussion, he mentioned he was 29 years old and her world came crashing.
    I will tell you why.
    She is way older (39years old)
    My friend is confused. She is planning to break up the relationship and I have advised her otherwise.

    So I ask; DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?
    If she's just dating, enjoy life. If she/they are considering long-term (i.e. marriage) I would definitely rethink the age thing. Age may not seem to matter now, but as you get older it will. I married someone 10 years older than I was. He was a good guy, but as he aged, he changed. He got crankier, set in his ways didn't want to do anything after we got our empty nest. He'd done things that I had not and wanted to experience (i.e. travel globally), but because he'd already done that he saw my aspirations as a waste, unimportant. And when it came to sex, let's just say I was in my prime, he was at his peak and going down fast.

    I'm not saying it can't work, but more often than not when women are older than the men, they tend to treat them men like sons and not men. The women lead because they know more, and eventually the man resents it seeking out other/new options where he can act as nature intended unless he's a user/coward type of dude. Weigh positives and negatives, pros and cons, and make decisions based on logic, not emotions is what I'd advise.
     

    MarleyK20

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    Why would a 20 year old want to be with a 50 year old? That’s a FWB type situation ain’t nothing real going to come of a 30 year gap in age.
    That's what I was thinking too. That's midlife crisis or made a mistake and stuck type of deal. Your convos be so different you really have little in common. That's some sugar daddy/momma bs🤣
     

    Travis

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    I have a friend who needs my advice. She met this cool dude in a train station and they got talking. After some weeks, He asked her out and she accepted. Of course, by this time, she had fallen heads over heels in love.

    Last week, during their discussion, he mentioned he was 29 years old and her world came crashing.
    I will tell you why.
    She is way older (39years old)
    My friend is confused. She is planning to break up the relationship and I have advised her otherwise.

    So I ask; DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?
    In my personal experience, age doesn't matter as long as you have a great connection and you're both open minded. You'll have to determine your "age", but the important thing is not the number of years, it is the quality of time spent together. The sex may be better at 35 than 25, depending on your own tastes and health.
     
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    Yes I'm my experience age does really matter. Anyone who says it doesn't is either lying or in denial. Now, mind you my husband is almost 20 years older than me (he had no kids before we met and we share two sons together which really assisted in us making our relationship long-term and serious because I wouldn't have been as interested if he had kids especially kids close or even older than myself). So, while age is important, or specially the age/generational gap, in a relationship it CAN work. My husband and I have been together for 8 plus years and still going strong. It's hard as hell sometimes and a lot of work on both sides in our marriage because of the generational gap (and personality differences as I'm very assertive and he's much more nonconfrontational in most situations). However, being very adaptable helps a lot. I'm much more mature than many in my age group and my husband keeps himself in very good physical shape and is very adoptable. More importantly, we share many of the same morals and general outlook so that definitely helps. We also compliment one another. That said, I have noticed that when the man is older (and can be an actual man and not some immature child in a man's body) it CAN work well with a younger woman, even a significantly younger woman. On the flip side, I have yet to see a long-term and relatively healthy relationship wherein the woman is older (especially significantly older) than her man. Every one of these such relationships ended because the man eventually lost interest (or never truly was interested in the first place and just wanted a mommy figure or someone to take care of him) in the older woman and it was hard on the older woman dealing with a younger and often time less mature man. I just wouldn't recommend this kind of relationship for any woman because it's almost always a doomed relationship because of the biological and mental differences in men and women and our maturity levels.
     

    GwynShivers

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    I have a friend who needs my advice. She met this cool dude in a train station and they got talking. After some weeks, He asked her out and she accepted. Of course, by this time, she had fallen heads over heels in love.

    Last week, during their discussion, he mentioned he was 29 years old and her world came crashing.
    I will tell you why.
    She is way older (39years old)
    My friend is confused. She is planning to break up the relationship and I have advised her otherwise.

    So I ask; DOES AGE MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP?
    In the words of Aaliyah, "Age Ain't Nothing But A Number"!
    I'm 8 years older than my husband & he's NOT complaining. 💯😁
     
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    In the words of Aaliyah, "Age Ain't Nothing But A Number"!
    I'm 8 years older than my husband & he's NOT complaining. 💯😁
    8 years isn't that big of a age difference because you and your husband are still in the same generation. But I'm happy for you Ms. Gwyn:-)
     

    GwynShivers

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    8 years isn't that big of a age difference because you and your husband are still in the same generation. But I'm happy for you Ms. Gwyn:-)
    "Thank ya kindly", in my John Witherspoon voice! 🤣
     

    SINCEREM

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    Why would a 20 year old want to be with a 50 year old? That’s a FWB type situation ain’t nothing real going to come of a 30 year gap in age.
    xD, such has happened here in my locality, where a 20 year old felt in-love with an old woman, I don't know the woman's age, but I feel she's up to 50-60 years. So, age isn't a barrier when it comes to relationship. You might not like such kind of relationship but their are others who doesn't mind, for me, I don't mind too, you can bring it on xD.
     

    Heatice

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    In the words of Aaliyah, "Age Ain't Nothing But A Number"!
    I'm 8 years older than my husband & he's NOT complaining. 💯😁
    Wow, that's awesome and he's a real man even though he's younger. Some men wouldn't know how to handle a wife that's older than them. Some would even start having inferiority complex and such comes with an unwanted attitude that's going to make the relationship unsettled.
     

    chinwe

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    There is a saying that age is just a number. well, this is not applicable to me as a lady, I can't see myself dating a younger guy, I will never be comfortable with that. To me, the proper thing is that the lady should be younger than the guy with atleast few years. nevertheles, everyone should do what works for them.
     

    Christybabe

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    Age does matter as far as I'm concerned. I wouldn't marry a man younger than me, but if the tables were turned,I will marry a woman that I am older than. My reasons are not far-fetched. Respect is important, stigmatization is also another problem,self confidence and societal values matter too. But good luck to anyone involved.
     

    Danny

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    29 years with 39 years isn't that bad as long as the guy is well behaved and is equally financially good be in a relationship. If he's a 29 years old that's behaving like a 19 years old, then it's not going to work. But for your friend to fall in love with him that well, it means that he's good enough to date her and the age shouldn't be a problem.