The Cookout

Banks · 9/24/21

Oh damn dude, who here has loaned money to a friend in need? I have only done it once and I regretted it. He of course is one of my childhood friends, but we've kinda lost touch in recent years. But, he can contact me whenever he needs a handout. And honestly I helped him with the understanding that he'd pay me back. But he took forever to pay me. I wasn't even asking for payments, just a little here and and a little there. The dude has the gall to then ask me months later if I could foot the bill for one of our meals when we hung out. And in fact, I asked the dude right there if he had any money to pay back.

I only intend to loan money to my mom and that's it, no one else is getting my help from here on out. Friends may mean well, but don't let em take advantage of you either.

lexodyssey · 9/24/21

I feel like that's a good way to lose a friend lol I mean, in some cases it's ok if you feel like you need to help a friend out. But if you're loaning the money with the intention on being paid back in a reasonable amount of time, things can get complicated.

Jay · 9/24/21

If I loan money I make them sign a contract stating what I’m lending, when I expect it back and I make it clear that I want the money back exactly how I gave it to you. I don’t want half back and a promise to mow my lawn for two years or jack shit like that. I also only lend out what I’m willing to lose so I’m not put in a compromising situation. But no one ever asks me fr money so it’s not an issue.

Banks · 9/25/21

lexodyssey said:
I feel like that's a good way to lose a friend lol I mean, in some cases it's ok if you feel like you need to help a friend out. But if you're loaning the money with the intention on being paid back in a reasonable amount of time, things can get complicated.

It is. I rarely talk to the guy anymore, and I feel like I lost a good friend because of it. I mean, we still converse, on facebook, but it's like "how ya doin?", "Did you hear about what so and so did" etc. But as of late, it's been silent on both sides.

Jay · 9/25/21

Banks said:
It is. I rarely talk to the guy anymore, and I feel like I lost a good friend because of it. I mean, we still converse, on facebook, but it's like "how ya doin?", "Did you hear about what so and so did" etc. But as of late, it's been silent on both sides.

Yeah yall just have water cooler talk now, sometimes it be that way.

Tati 304 · 9/25/21

Money and business will always ruin friendship.

My mom always told me "never a borrower or lender be" and it is stuck in my head.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/5/23

Banks said:
Oh damn dude, who here has loaned money to a friend in need? I have only done it once and I regretted it. He of course is one of my childhood friends, but we've kinda lost touch in recent years. But, he can contact me whenever he needs a handout. And honestly I helped him with the understanding that he'd pay me back. But he took forever to pay me. I wasn't even asking for payments, just a little here and and a little there. The dude has the gall to then ask me months later if I could foot the bill for one of our meals when we hung out. And in fact, I asked the dude right there if he had any money to pay back.

I only intend to loan money to my mom and that's it, no one else is getting my help from here on out. Friends may mean well, but don't let em take advantage of you either.

Fully agree. It is crazy how this keeps happening, and folks wonder why so people become uptight when others ask for money.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/5/23

Jay said:
Yeah yall just have water cooler talk now, sometimes it be that way.

Yep. Just surface level stuff. Nothing trustworthy. He knows his role and is playing it. I don't know why folks borrow money from folks and then have the nerve to get mad when the other person doesn't want to have the same relationship as before.

Supabrett · 3/5/23

I loan assuming I'll never get it back.
Makes it easy for me.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/5/23

Supabrett said:
I loan assuming I'll never get it back.
Makes it easy for me.

I totally understand why you say that. It is like a test. Are we really friends? If you don't pay me back in a timely manner, then you are not my friend. By you assuming you will never get it back, it takes stress off of you as well since you are giving it like a gift although if they pay it back like they said they would, then that is great.

MR-D-ROB · 3/5/23

I'm like Yella Beezy on that subject.
I sat down and did the calculations on how much loaning money and doing favors has costed me.
It was well over 6 figures.
What's worse is once I quit doing all these favors people get mad as if I owe it to them to do stuff for them.

So as Yella Beezy said....
I'm done with the favors!

Deleted member 1348 · 3/6/23

I heard a pastor once said that if you lend money, lend an amount that if you don't get it back you are financially okay. Basically lend only what you can afford. Like its a gift, but its not. Not the rent money. Not the car insurance money. I've always maintained that if I lend and I only "lend" to certain people.
I also don't sweat them for it. If I don't get it back its like that scene below in Bronx Tale. I got rid of that person for good. I've had people not pay but the amount was low and I didn't miss it and they came back for more. I didn't even bring up the last loan, I straight ignored them. A very, very few people, I've actually given them more than they asked. I didn't expect it back. Or even wanted it back. That's rare and there are very special circumstances why I did.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/6/23

Jay said:
If I loan money I make them sign a contract stating what I’m lending, when I expect it back and I make it clear that I want the money back exactly how I gave it to you. I don’t want half back and a promise to mow my lawn for two years or jack shit like that. I also only lend out what I’m willing to lose so I’m not put in a compromising situation. But no one ever asks me fr money so it’s not an issue.

Great response. I see some folks lend out money they desperately need to a person who they thought they were good with. And that forced them to have to work harder to get their money back.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/6/23

Banks said:
It is. I rarely talk to the guy anymore, and I feel like I lost a good friend because of it. I mean, we still converse, on facebook, but it's like "how ya doin?", "Did you hear about what so and so did" etc. But as of late, it's been silent on both sides.

I don't think I would talk to this person at all. I would just leave that person on read. But I understand why you did it. Being cordial. I am glad it went silent on both ends.

Sovereign · 3/6/23

Supabrett said:
I loan assuming I'll never get it back.
Makes it easy for me.

Easy but then isn’t it better to not lend at all?

Saundy · 3/6/23

Supabrett said:
I loan assuming I'll never get it back.
Makes it easy for me.

If I do loan any money. I do it with the expectation of not getting it back. However, I know that is one less person that I will borrow money.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/6/23

MR-D-ROB said:
I'm like Yella Beezy on that subject.
I sat down and did the calculations on how much loaning money and doing favors has costed me.
It was well over 6 figures.
What's worse is once I quit doing all these favors people get mad as if I owe it to them to do stuff for them.

So as Yella Beezy said....
I'm done with the favors!

I've been done. I don't want to be an ATM.

GwynShivers · 3/6/23

Banks said:
Oh damn dude, who here has loaned money to a friend in need? I have only done it once and I regretted it. He of course is one of my childhood friends, but we've kinda lost touch in recent years. But, he can contact me whenever he needs a handout. And honestly I helped him with the understanding that he'd pay me back. But he took forever to pay me. I wasn't even asking for payments, just a little here and and a little there. The dude has the gall to then ask me months later if I could foot the bill for one of our meals when we hung out. And in fact, I asked the dude right there if he had any money to pay back.

I only intend to loan money to my mom and that's it, no one else is getting my help from here on out. Friends may mean well, but don't let em take advantage of you either.

If I give it to you, it's from my heart & I don't expect repayment. But if you ask to borrow a certain amount from me, IT'S A DAMN LOAN, so don't come with no 🦬💩, when it's time to repay, per our written agreement!
The only exception will be is, if you contact me prior to the due date, which is also listed in the agreement.

R'Gos Rho · 3/6/23

Unless made expressly clear that it is a “loan”, be ok with never seeing it again.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/28/23

GwynShivers said:
If I give it to you, it's from my heart & I don't expect repayment. But if you ask to borrow a certain amount from me, IT'S A DAMN LOAN, so don't come with no 🦬💩, when it's time to repay, per our written agreement!
The only exception will be is, if you contact me prior to the due date, which is also listed in the agreement.

I love how you said "written agreement" instead of verbal agreement.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/28/23

R'Gos Rho said:
Unless made expressly clear that it is a “loan”, be ok with never seeing it again.

Same thing I said. In other words, now I have lost my friend and my money. I actually saw this saying at a beauty salon. The owner was tired of folks asking her for money since it is a cash only business.

Deleted member 1946 · 3/28/23

Jay said:
If I loan money I make them sign a contract stating what I’m lending, when I expect it back and I make it clear that I want the money back exactly how I gave it to you. I don’t want half back and a promise to mow my lawn for two years or jack shit like that. I also only lend out what I’m willing to lose so I’m not put in a compromising situation. But no one ever asks me fr money so it’s not an issue.

I can't tell you how many times somebody either hid from me when it was time to repay it, wanted to pay it back in installments or offered to do errands for me instead of giving me my money.

GwynShivers · 3/28/23

educatedman23 said:
I love how you said "written agreement" instead of verbal agreement.

Just in case you must go to court, that's what the judge will ask for. Text messages are also admissible in court.

GwynShivers · 3/28/23

educatedman23 said:
I can't tell you how many times somebody either hid from me when it was time to repay it, wanted to pay it back in installments or offered to do errands for me instead of giving me my money.

Those are the people that can't ever return for a favor, because they never intended to repay their debt.

GwynShivers · 3/28/23

educatedman23 said:
Same thing I said. In other words, now I have lost my friend and my money. I actually saw this saying at a beauty salon. The owner was tired of folks asking her for money since it is a cash only business.

The other thing is, if it's a BOBO, some of our people are ALWAYS expecting A HOOK UP!
Do you get hook ups from Anti-Black businesses?
Support your people, period! Tip when you can, send your family & friends their way. Be a part of growing Black Wall Street, NOT destroying it!

The Cookout

Loaning money to friends

Sixer

Senior Sixer

The First Sixer

Sixer

The First Sixer

Sixer

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Sixer

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Master Sixer

Deleted member 1348

Guest

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Master Sixer

Registered

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Royal Sixer

Sixer

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Deleted member 1946

Guest

Royal Sixer

Royal Sixer

Royal Sixer

Privacy & Transparency

Privacy & Transparency